tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8255138009290370112024-03-05T03:38:42.214-08:00Writings From the Second WorldA writing blog by Anne Becker, currently an unpublished writer seeking to become a published one. This is the chronicle of her journey into becoming a professional: the work itself, agents, publishers, workshops, and what she learns. Check in with her periodically and see if she's run screaming yet...Anne F.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14442385165430082302noreply@blogger.comBlogger30125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825513800929037011.post-53746855381615826152023-02-08T09:29:00.001-08:002023-02-08T09:29:47.449-08:00News! Real news. And a new blog!<div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8FRTDTDkZyO7F_6FCHGVXHbsl-BlzVdJLDU6WTv1Qup3SQdOCvKZnA-BOeq39gF8VAQwhtJCAZ0Mig5zoVU-shEe1Rct3Fyqa7Pbkx0QykBnuT6ijO_rzIDUxitaZ38hclcAg86NdlYH2fkpIcJs8IzPregJfO4ESRWu8BLoQj85LHlUEBd5iB4uK/s3378/Kiki4_leaf.jpg" style="display: block; padding: 1em 0; text-align: center; clear: left; float: left;"><img alt="" border="0" height="320" data-original-height="3378" data-original-width="2699" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8FRTDTDkZyO7F_6FCHGVXHbsl-BlzVdJLDU6WTv1Qup3SQdOCvKZnA-BOeq39gF8VAQwhtJCAZ0Mig5zoVU-shEe1Rct3Fyqa7Pbkx0QykBnuT6ijO_rzIDUxitaZ38hclcAg86NdlYH2fkpIcJs8IzPregJfO4ESRWu8BLoQj85LHlUEBd5iB4uK/s320/Kiki4_leaf.jpg"/></a></div>
<p>Well, first things first! The little bit of cuteness in my mood photo is my new Shiloh, Kiki! We got her in August and she has been a ROYAL PAIN (in the way of energetic puppies) but we still love her. :)
<p>Second things second--a lot has happened since my last post. I engaged beta readers and professional editors and a proofreader (oh my), I did at least five more rewrites on East of the Sun, and I submitted to 84 agents and got two partial requests and a lot of personalized responses but no offers. Even as I was submitting to agents, though, my mind had started to switch gears, and I was honestly relieved when the last rejection came in. I am now less than a month away from finally indie-publishing East of the Sun, and West of the Moon (the sequel) is about done, so that should be out later this year.
<p>Though I understand that putting my first books out myself could mean dropping them into an endless black hole of unread books, I am honestly happy to finally be moving forward with my writing. I have digested reams of information on how to do all this "properly" while recognizing that everyone's road is different. I am progmatic, but hopeful that the books will find an audience who love this stuff as much as I do.
<p>So, later this month I'll be making the final post on this blog, because I have a new one--on my new author web site, in fact! I'd post it now, but it's the last thing I'm finishing up before I hit "Publish". Well, that and the dang reader magnet for my mailing list. I still struggle with short fiction. Give me a new novel any day...
<p>I did want to make a couple more posts here because I was on the Viable Paradise web site this morning, touching base with old memories, and I remembered that they'd linked to my post on how much I loved and valued my experience at VP. Since there's always the chance that someone will run across this old thing when they access that, it seemed smart to touch base again and at least give a bit of closure here and a redirect.
<p>So--anyone who ends up reading this, do check in again toward the end of the month. I'll have a shiny book cover and new website to share!
<p>Thanks everyone!Anne F.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14442385165430082302noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825513800929037011.post-13948102455407217422021-02-18T19:39:00.001-08:002021-02-18T19:39:54.271-08:00Doorways. Closed and Open.First of all, Kyrie passed away this winter. The day after Christmas. I made the choice to say goodbye to her when her ailments had become too much; and I don't regret it, and I do, which is the way of such things. At some point I will probably have a great deal to write about grief.
So that is a closed doorway. So is this, to start with.
There is a doorway in the back of your mind. Beyond it is everything you need to know to write your stories. Everything you need is already there, waiting. The memory of your eighth-grade teacher who everyone was afraid of. The smell of popcorn crushed and rotting in the sun at the amusement park. The look in the eyes of your favorite and most beloved pet when you told them what a good creature they were and how much you loved them. The characters that live in your brain like a cast of disembodied voices. All of it.
To reach for it, you need to take the steps. It will not come to you. Narnia will not find the door from the opposite side and tell you that it's time to come in.
Or perhaps it will. Or already does. And these are the times we think about sitting down to write. Or to paint. Or to art in whatever way is our way of arting.
But then, for whatever reason, we don't. Those calls are weak, apparently. We want the bolt of lightning. We expect to be swept off our feet. Until then, we wait.
You will be waiting forever.
Wake up.
Show up.
Move the first move.
Open the door of the wardrobe.
Push past the coats and stodgy rubber boots and floppy, moth-eaten mittens.
Step out into the winter of your neglected creativity. Become its hero. Fight for the turn of its seasons.
Create.
And that is an open door.
Anne F.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14442385165430082302noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825513800929037011.post-56414314884089597742015-10-15T20:15:00.000-07:002015-10-15T20:25:44.717-07:00A Brief Pre-Nano Blurb<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjakwl-08V2Kji53ZIuntSiWp_tga7VFHXVrP1KR1HMeCJJ_PUgYgOvsuIBLCQjAU2DmyrIjuyLIVheazqOd9p2KNhhhJzzaeqkdvLAjzFy8sE46htTrAMG_ql0wgnL6fYZyCyO8kIPSYQ/s1600/MoodKyrie_grave.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjakwl-08V2Kji53ZIuntSiWp_tga7VFHXVrP1KR1HMeCJJ_PUgYgOvsuIBLCQjAU2DmyrIjuyLIVheazqOd9p2KNhhhJzzaeqkdvLAjzFy8sE46htTrAMG_ql0wgnL6fYZyCyO8kIPSYQ/s200/MoodKyrie_grave.jpg" /></a></div>
Today's Mood Kyrie is grave and focused, gazing into the near-distance...where lies an almost-impossible amount of work! <P>
It's been five years almost to the day since I was sitting in the condo at Viable Paradise, writing in my journal and expressing a lot of doubts. Oh, there were doubts. After the first full day I wrote about whether I was really cut out to be a writer. I wasn't sure what the heck I was doing there, in Martha's Vineyard that rainy October, trying to be one, when everyone else I met seemed to be fitting in a lot better than I felt like I was. Perhaps they were more comfortable in their writerly skins; perhaps my view was just skewed. <P>
This attitude reversed somewhat after I spent time with my awesome roomie Gwen and a couple other students and of course instructors like Teresa and Steven and Laura, and I felt like maybe I wasn't quite so big of a social failure and that maybe there was hope for me after all. But in a lot of ways that me of five years back was pretty on-target. I had a LONG way to go. <P>
So now it's 2015 and I've written two and a half novels and a dozen or so short stories, and, barring distractions like dogs and puppies and surgery and concussions and Crohn's disease, I've not lost sight of the gold ring. I feel like my writerly muscles have grown, and honestly for the first time I feel (despite still having a problem with passive beginnings--I HATE YOU PASSIVE BEGINNINGS) like I can actually set out to write some of the stories in my head and do them justice. Combine that with a wake-up call on a drive back from the hospital (which I may blog about later) and I have been busting my ass this month in order to get at least three stories out on submission before NaNo hits.<P>
<p> It's the countdown to NaNoWriMo, of course, and <a href="http://nanowrimo.org/pep-talks/brandon-sanderson-2011">as Brandon Sanderson talks about doing in his awesome NaNoWriMo Pep Talk of 2011,</a> I'm going in this time planning to use NaNo for less-than-conventional purposes.
Because once NaNo is here, it is ON and <i>East of the Sun</i> is getting a complete re-write (sorry November, this year you're NaNoEditMo). I'm hoping to have it ready for my first reader(s) by the new year. So I won't have time for those shorts, and they need to get on the page now. <P>
Much to my amazement, this is getting accomplished. I have a story out on submission, another finished and getting an edit before sending out, and yet another almost complete. And an idea for a fourth that I think I can finish by the end of the month. Madness!
Hopefully I'm right and my muscles have really gotten strong enough to put these out there the way I'd like them to be. Crossing fingers...send up some good writerly thoughts for me, won't you?
<P>See you on the far side of November, unless I'm driven to escape from Editing Hell through blogging!<P>
Anne F.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14442385165430082302noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825513800929037011.post-975194303755066542015-07-02T20:31:00.000-07:002015-07-02T20:31:33.940-07:00Old Stories<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiM6NrvYgLq7TbD0peVxvF3q12jlgsYShP-0AyangzdqUVzgR8vzrN7YXuCnYvi9ZQp_sfiV6DS6EvmFZ6Ru-K6ffwE9wMBqCCODFuY0D5HrLLcosqnucerw-aKaBQP4jI7baL3vDBbQwo/s1600/kyrietwinklesmall.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiM6NrvYgLq7TbD0peVxvF3q12jlgsYShP-0AyangzdqUVzgR8vzrN7YXuCnYvi9ZQp_sfiV6DS6EvmFZ6Ru-K6ffwE9wMBqCCODFuY0D5HrLLcosqnucerw-aKaBQP4jI7baL3vDBbQwo/s200/kyrietwinklesmall.JPG" /></a></div><P>
I keep my old stories in an archive that I call the Oubliette. Because sometimes you write something that you end up just wanting to pitch down into the dark and walk away from.<P>
There's sometimes a misconception, I think, that every piece of writing that a writer completes will be publishable (or at least useful) at some point down the road. Sure, we all hear about the "million words of crap" you have to write to get good at your craft. And yet, once you get to a certain point I think that there's this subconscious expectation that you are through with the crap. <P>
My Viable Paradise classmate Jake Kerr once wrote something to the effect that he knows full well that not every story he writes deserves to be published. I know when I read that, I thought, "Oh!" with a small shock of realization. Because I had been thinking that every story that I had started or finished DID have to be good enough for that. At some point. In the far-distant future. After I had edited and re-written the hell out of it. <P>
So, despite the fact that we know about the crap, sometimes I think our brains have a stubbornness about certain fragments or ideas. Perhaps these are the "darlings" we are supposed to kill (many times they probably are). But mightn't they also be…I dunno, vestigial bits of goo? Flapping their half-formed wings clumsily as they thrash about in much disorder, and yet hiding within their plasm a single perfectly-formed eye, or a hand crafted fine enough to assay Handel on the pianoforte? <P>
I have formed the opinion that in every half-formed piece of crap there is a feisty dung-beetle that's actually a glittering scarab. When I look back at the stuff I have written, even as a kid, there is always SOMETHING there. A mood. The idea of a place. A line of description. (But never dialogue. I have always sucked at dialogue.) <P>
There is the urge to stuff the crap into the Oublitte and never look at it again. The fear that it is, indeed, SO bad that reading through the thing will summon the gremlins of insecurity and doubt that writers and artists already spend too much time beating off with fireplace pokers (an ancient copy of Writers' Market works also). <P>
I think this is a mistake. Often we wrote these things for the same reason we wrote the things that we think are really good: we had to. There was something about that idea that we had to explore. It had to come out. It did—perhaps badly. But that seed of what made you want to write about it is still there. Pull out that old story at the right time, and it might take light, like an ember, and tell you what it really wanted to be all along. <P>
Anne F.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14442385165430082302noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825513800929037011.post-63657218909348067192015-06-25T19:09:00.000-07:002015-06-25T19:09:08.832-07:00The Muse Trap <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjuElwLJqe5yJrr5C-cqaMbGogCsS75iHYEm8XBwDqpZ0zPnwz9OXJARSQaLRlIs6Awswz6QFyEQrocr9wOLxQRDBiTqAcB-85m3vJnGzHSUs6KsW5dwXHROW2RfxoyvfzsUuXd4rx9I7Y/s1600/Astra3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjuElwLJqe5yJrr5C-cqaMbGogCsS75iHYEm8XBwDqpZ0zPnwz9OXJARSQaLRlIs6Awswz6QFyEQrocr9wOLxQRDBiTqAcB-85m3vJnGzHSUs6KsW5dwXHROW2RfxoyvfzsUuXd4rx9I7Y/s200/Astra3.jpg" /></a></div><P> Today, Kyrie's daughter Astra. She's very bright and sunny, and thus suitable for illumination!
<P>So…my muse is kind of scruffy, and she glares a lot. I imagine that she's a chain-smoker, because it would just figure, right, with me being allergic to cigarette smoke? My muse likes colorful language. It's a bit purple for my tastes right out of the gate, but we usually catch it in the edits.
<P>Yesterday I posted about how I make myself sit down and write after the end of my workday (I have a perfectly good office at work, after all, which I do not have at home). I make myself do it even if I don't have much time at all. I do it even if all I have is ten or fifteen minutes.
<P>That ten or fifteen minutes is not any ordinary quarter-hour. I am building a muse trap.
<P>Not long ago I found myself on a flight to Wisconsin (where I got older, if not precisely grew up, for those keeping track of that sort of thing). I don't fly often, and usually I don't listen to music when I do, but that day I had the urge, so I dug my earbuds out of my purse and slipped them in.
<P>The urge to write, WRITE, WRITE NOW! was immediate and overwhelming. I hesitated, confused, then whipped out my journal. Half an hour later I stopped and had a good think about what had just happened. It wasn't terribly hard to unravel--was, in fact, ridiculously simple.
<P>It was this: For the past several years I had only put on my earbuds when I sat down to write. My subconscious mind had locked onto the action of putting on the earbuds as an indicator that it was time to write. And voila--the muse trap!
<P>This isn't a new idea by any means and I had even read about it before. There is, in fact, an excellent book out there called <i>The Power of Habit</i> by Charles Duhigg in which the author describes how people, sports teams, and even businesses learned how to rewire their habits (or other people's) and experienced dramatic change.
<P>But--it's real! (No, obviously I don't believe everything I read, even when I should.) And you can use it! So I'm sharing it! Here is how to Built Your Own Muse Trap in 15 minutes a day!
<P>Part One: Steal Underpants. No, wait. Part one is, identify something that you do (or could start doing) <b>every time</b> you sit down to write. It doesn't have to be special or weird or involve chocolate, though it certainly can. If it involves an object, that object does not need to be Magical (my earbuds are the same sorry old set that came with my iPhone). Of course, you can certainly choose something Magical (say, super-special noise-blocking earbuds) but if you do make sure that it's the action that's important, not the object. Because then what happens if you desperately need to finish Chapter 15 and…you lost/forgot/your dog ate/your cat mangled your Magical object?? Yeah. So…it's the ACTION that's important. The cue, if you will, that it is now time to get serious. It's on. Oh yeah, it is.
<P>Part Two: Sit down and write. But right before you do, use your cue. Put in the earbuds. Light the candle you carry with you even when you travel because, really, hotel rooms could stand to smell more like awesome. Pop open a beverage of your choice. But it should not be a beverage you have every day, unless you are writing every day. As you should. But I digress.
<P>The thing is, this habit street is two-way. Once your brain latches onto a cue, you need to reinforce that cue by immediately doing the habit you want to form (writing). If you use the cue and DON'T write then you would have been me on that airplane if I hadn't whipped out the journal. If you are not reinforcing, you are undermining. You want your muse trap to work, don't you? So be particular about what your muse-summoning action is. Something you can do anywhere…but also something that you don't otherwise do all the time.
<P>Don't look at me like that. I know you can figure this out.
<P>Part Three: PROFIT. A muse! In the trap! One that is, given, probably glaring at you. But that's just because you haven't finished that story yet. And now you will!
<P>In the future I'm thinking I'll need a different cue for editing. I really want to have my Creative-Brain summoned a little differently than my Editor-Brain. Maybe then I'll be able to switch gears in the flick of an…earbud?
<P>So get out there, and figure out a good habit for yourself, for a change. Figure out how you're going to Build Your Very Own Muse Trap. In fifteen minutes a day. Although, usually it's not just fifteen minutes. But that's another post.
<P>And remember…be vewwwwy quiet. We're hunting <i>habits</i>. Anne F.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14442385165430082302noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825513800929037011.post-4275940024336773612015-06-24T18:09:00.003-07:002015-06-24T18:10:21.540-07:00Perspective<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFk7axQx5hadDsE_ZDbT3e-fS18mHjV7vU8H-w0TRLc2hHDdEzpCIQ_C0NOWxN-va2grBLYDDQWx83Sr-cSPdhyUHYlLmlh2oObFNZc9BriKulgpfts9YYrz8OFu7iK4fOTKFkqcEXDak/s1600/Jax_birthday.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFk7axQx5hadDsE_ZDbT3e-fS18mHjV7vU8H-w0TRLc2hHDdEzpCIQ_C0NOWxN-va2grBLYDDQWx83Sr-cSPdhyUHYlLmlh2oObFNZc9BriKulgpfts9YYrz8OFu7iK4fOTKFkqcEXDak/s200/Jax_birthday.JPG" /></a></div> <P>
Our Mood Kyrie today is actually her son, Ajax, on his birthday. Kyrie, for her part, refuses to wear silly hats. <P>
So this January--after six various surgeries and other medical procedures--I was diagnosed with Crohn's disease. Upon this happening I was advised by my doctor to go gluten-free, which can help with inflammation. This was a big change--for the way I shopped, the way I cooked, the way I went out (almost being in tears because I couldn't order what I really wanted one night is a memory that will stick with me). <P>
And of course I was still busy with everything else in my life. Trying to make sure the Shiloh Shepherd sticks around, for example. A breed is a fragile thing. When you're not AKC, who's keeping a breed of dog alive? I'll tell you--it's a world full of people milling around, disagreeing with one another. (Oh, just like real life, you say? True enough.) And just like with real life, if enough people stop caring about a thing, it dies. With a breed of dog, you'll never get that gene pool back. So here I am in the midst of everything else taking populations genetics courses and trying to absorb that too. <P>
And the writing. Though I've been bad about blogging, I haven't stopped with the writing, nor with the submitting. The rejections slowly pile up, some of them with attached notes; others, from places that actually hung onto the story for ten months, with nothing more than a form. (Really? Ah well.) I have taken to writing every day after work, with the lights out, in my office, plugged into my mood music, for fifteen minutes to an hour. I don't track words because I can get obsessive about that. It's much like with weight loss; the scale can be depressing, so I measure instead. Word counts can be depressing, so I am happy getting something--anything--done on my current story.<P>
<P>It's all perspective.<P>
In the midst of all of this and family and husband and a house to clean and work to do just like everyone else, a birthday came along. <P>
Birthdays for me (and New Years, too) are days of forced perspective. They can't be ignored or blown off. Not totally. Because somewhere on that day, be it while I'm playing frisbee with a dog or when I'm finally falling into bed, my brain will sit up and say, "Well?"
<P>What are you going to tell your brain when it does that? You're probably going to feel a lot like you did when you failed your parents or failed remembering your friend's birthday or failed on your latest diet. You're going to feel guilty or you're going to feel depressed or you're going to feel disappointed in yourself, which is the worst. Or maybe you'll just want a donut. And you can't have one (because you're gluten free).
<P>But what you HOPE you can tell your brain is, hey, look, I'm progressing. Which is why, when I originally thought that I shouldn't bother to sit down and write at the end of my workday if I only had fifteen minutes, I ignored myself and sat down. It's all perspective. I'd rather be looking at the world--chronic disease, dogs, diet, donuts--and say that I'm at least still in there, slugging away and messing things up and every once in a while doing something pretty darn good. <P>
On occasion, I even write something that seems to indicate that all the time my Viable Paradise instructors and fellow students (and my writing buddy, Jarrad) spent critiquing me wasn't wasted. Maybe I get the Final Fantasy "level up" music in my head. It does happen.<P>
Hey, look. I'm progressing.Anne F.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14442385165430082302noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825513800929037011.post-47096614202098030142014-02-26T15:31:00.001-08:002014-02-26T15:32:44.076-08:00The Eye, the Hand, and the Mind<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh17p7zMfZweZ62Iauwf9huJPsO32zSZFKnRh2HhYu83c2DMlL0dEXQ5DF_kXZe52CWuxTJ3EQcSIhO8_06avJHkG-Hn2i33ItMuRCxytv2VCE5Rr89hNqHqS-CWnlEa3SV9eh6Ea8bHG4/s1600/ZenThorn.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh17p7zMfZweZ62Iauwf9huJPsO32zSZFKnRh2HhYu83c2DMlL0dEXQ5DF_kXZe52CWuxTJ3EQcSIhO8_06avJHkG-Hn2i33ItMuRCxytv2VCE5Rr89hNqHqS-CWnlEa3SV9eh6Ea8bHG4/s320/ZenThorn.JPG" /></a></div><P>
Huddle 'round, grasshoppers, says Zen Thorn, and let's talk about improving technique!<P>
(Actually, Zen Thorn really wanted a treat and was attempting to mind control me. But let's go forward with the other topic; I'm not quite ready to talk about canine mind control. Yet.)<P>
This week I sent out a new short story. It seems that the answer to being sick of editing my novel is to switch focus for a couple weeks. Which is not good, in that I need to get more done on the novel, but also good, because it helps me to internalize the techniques I'll use to make my novel better by practicing them on the short fiction.<P>
I will admit that when I think about what this story put me through, and then consider that my novel is equivalent to TWENTY of those, the wisdom tooth surgery I have coming up next week looks paltry in comparison.<P>
But I digress…<P>
I talk about the relationship between art and writing a lot on here, and this is no exception. Long story short (hah!), there are always times in my writing where it feels like I'm pushing a boulder up a mountain. This time it felt like the mountain fell on me. <P>
I despaired. I went from really feeling (in the early stages) like this might be the best thing I'd written so far, to raging and gnashing my teeth because I just could NOT see my way through editing the second part of the story. I knew it was flawed, and it drove me crazy because I couldn't see how to fix it.<P>
Essentially, my Eye had progressed to the point where I knew something was wrong. But my Hand (or in this case, my Mind) wasn't yet at the same level as my Eye.<P>
This is very similar to what happens in learning to paint, or draw, or attempt any other human pursuit of excellence, if you believe the Conscious Competence Ladder.<P>
I think most of us have seen the Conscious Competence Ladder, yet I always manage to conveniently forget it exists when I'm in the middle of a funk where reminding myself that No, Anne, You Are Not Alone might help. Essentially the theory goes that there are four stages of competence: <P>
1. Unconscious Incompetence, also called You Are Clueless And Don't Know It Yet, also called "Blissful Ignorance". You try something new and you are delighted. In painting, this is the "Hey! I painted something! Neato!" stage. In NaNoWriMo this is called the "YAY I Finished a NOVEL!" stage. It is followed by: <P>
2. The Conscious Incompetence stage, which is what I hit on this story. Your eye has gotten better (usually through looking at the work of people better than you), and suddenly errors in your work glare out at you because your hand or mind hasn't caught up yet. Also called the "Oh God I Suck" stage. Or the "OMG EDITING?!?" stage. Or the "Have a Beer" stage…maybe that's just me.<P>
But there's hope! Don’t quit! In my case, I had a beer. I played with my dogs. I slept on it, and I read a couple of excellent writing books (pretty much anything by Donald Maass, at this stage in my writing development) to try to troubleshoot. <P>
In other words, I didn't give up. And when I realized what my problem was, I groaned. I had fallen victim to "Don't Tell Me About Your Character"-itis (hereby shortened to DTMAYC-itis, though you can substitute "world" for "character"). <P>
I'll make another post about this, maybe, but suffice to say that I had fallen into giving way too much information about the world and how it worked. This caused the story to feel slow, awkward, and contrived, because you shouldn't give away any information for free and then not until there's a reason for your audience to really want to know it. When I realized this, I couldn't believe that I'd done it. The solution was to step back and ask myself "What is the STORY about here?" Once I cut out all the goop and got back to the real essence of the story, the issue fixed itself. <P>
BUT! The important thing to take away from this, other than to not ask people about their RPG characters (or tell them about yours), is that I had entered Stage Three, which is: <P>
3. Conscious Competence! This is the "Ugh This Hurts" stage, in which you must THINK about what you are fixing, understand it, and OWN that bugger. This is the work part, where you train your hand and mind to catch up with your eye. I will never again fall victim to DTWAYC-itis. I recognize it now, and so I will be able to avoid it entirely or troubleshoot it effortlessly next time, thus leading to: <P>
4. Unconscious Competence, where you live in a world of magic and rainbows (or, if you are a horror writer, perhaps evil cars and scary clown-people). This is the mindset where you're not sure why your stuff is coming out so well, it just does. It seems natural to you. This is what everyone aims for. Your eye spots issues, your mind knows how to fix them, your hand puts them down on the page. Maybe not effortless, but not like pushing a boulder up a mountain.<P>
I have a theory that in complicated endeavors like art and writing, you hit steps one through four again every time you hit a new type of problem. This can make you want to hurt people, or to give up, or to make yourself another martini. But you should do none of these! Think on it: If you screw up in enough different ways, and learn to fix your screw-ups, and own them, then you will hit Unconscious Competence in EVERYTHING! <P>
You can be brilliant in every aspect of your chosen field that matters to you enough for you to have screwed it up and fixed it. But the only way to get there is to get out and DO it. Draw. Program. Sculpt. Write. Don't quit. <P>
Get out there and screw up!Anne F.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14442385165430082302noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825513800929037011.post-69515900244347598302013-12-30T15:11:00.001-08:002013-12-30T15:11:53.481-08:00Welcome to the Hell of Editing<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzXVSyNT9qSjDP26Pe3zgS8w-4CSUSwReayZAIjEjS0qOWqMZhjX0TKQK8cgdKQdLmeUdKIieuxKRnGQ9sk7Ukia2n5gTYBfrvjRqe9ftfL8boSEAyfSeBrCbwzctKHzb_LppIDRMG_s4/s1600/Mood_Astra.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzXVSyNT9qSjDP26Pe3zgS8w-4CSUSwReayZAIjEjS0qOWqMZhjX0TKQK8cgdKQdLmeUdKIieuxKRnGQ9sk7Ukia2n5gTYBfrvjRqe9ftfL8boSEAyfSeBrCbwzctKHzb_LppIDRMG_s4/s200/Mood_Astra.JPG" /></a></div><P><P>
Today's Mood Puppy is a Mood Astra! Astra is Kyrie's first daughter. :) All fresh and happy and ready for adventure, she was just like me when I finished my second novel last month (YAY). I looked forward to finally starting the editing process on both books.
<P>Astra, at least, is still happy. I, in comparison, took a wrong turn at Albuquerque.
<p>Though editing has been a trial at times, it has taught me a lot and I have come to enjoy the tightening and polishing. I felt excited about applying those new skills to <i>East of the Sun</i>. What changed?
<P>One, I started writing that first book in 2010. It is two days from clicking over into 2014, and to say that I'm a far better writer now is pretty safe. So part of my initial Edit-Shock comes from realizing how MUCH work I'm going to be doing to bring the first parts of <i>EotS</i> into line with what I can do now.
<P>Two, in realizing how far the writing has to go, I'm seeing all sorts of places that are going to require significant plot changes, and that makes me very, very happy that I bought Aeon Timeline at the end of NaNoWriMo because I think I'm going to need it to keep track of who does what when, where, and why.
<P>There's a lot of pure terror in me right now, looking at these two books. I love the story, I love my characters, I can see so many ways to make both of them better. It's just going to be...hard. Very hard. Harder, in fact, than writing the books in the first place because everything needs to get so much tighter.
<P>So I have done two things to motivate myself, because they always say that the best tools for finishing things are a deadline and accountability!
<P>First, literary agent and author Donald Maass is giving a hands-on seminar in the DFW area for aspiring novelists the first week in May. I got in, and now I MUST get the books in a state which will not completely embarrass me! In order for me to benefit most from this seminar, the books need to be as good as they possibly can be, so that the feedback I get will really help me. I want to start submitting these to agents by the end of 2014.
<P>Second, I decided that I would write about editing EotS here, in the blog, chapter by chapter. I will feel disgusted with myself if I don't see progress in those blog entries, and it will also serve as a record of how I've improved my writing because I'll be utilizing everything I've learned in the last four years. And I think I can do it in general terms, without giving out any spoilers!
<P>So here we go. First, my logline: This is a story about a girl whose family sells her to a bear. And about everything that follows from it...
<P>I went through my first two chapters of EotS and realized that they were probably actually three chapters, first off. The two were long already (my chapters tend to run 5k words average in rough--these were 5.5K and 6.5K) and I saw that there were other scenes I needed to put in.
<P>Reasons for those other scenes? My first chapter needs to start off with action and I hadn't given one of my mains enough time in the spotlight. I'd also kept her more passive and she was not that kind of character! In addition, I needed less overall description and more of the action showing the dire situation the family is in, to build tension.
<P>Along with that dire situation I realized that I was missing an opportunity to introduce the main villain via a violent encounter instead of with passive hints. Instead of merely showing the aftermath as I had before, I wrote the violent scene in. In the process I discovered some surprising things about the relationship between the two oldest brothers...things I'll be able to use later.
<P>So, more active scenes, stepping up the tension, the main characters strive actively to keep the family alive and hopefully gain our sympathy, while some others...well, you'll find out in time. But I decided that things still weren't bad enough, and that I was being too easy on my characters--I had this tendency, and have tried to squash it. So I decided to poison the last possible easy food source, traumatizing one of my main characters in the process, and also killed off an innocent minor character.
<P>Now things are really bad. One life lost, another dying, everyone's hungry, one desperate family member has attacked another, and a monster is loose on the mountain. Awesome! On to chapter 2.
Anne F.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14442385165430082302noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825513800929037011.post-67186397223956829692013-11-16T08:40:00.001-08:002013-11-16T08:40:35.822-08:00Writing Analysis<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjiHiHlg4WWiPYCQ45205YThI-Sm4O4TcXlctJOzeTQJ9s3fPl5YfpI1ssgI1p__HrI9VBThsxel-VZ6odEFn109de2anemvIG4D5GriIBm9FX6jmWMDva78EX54EJnCVD-1PMy97zxV34/s1600/Baxter_head_small.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjiHiHlg4WWiPYCQ45205YThI-Sm4O4TcXlctJOzeTQJ9s3fPl5YfpI1ssgI1p__HrI9VBThsxel-VZ6odEFn109de2anemvIG4D5GriIBm9FX6jmWMDva78EX54EJnCVD-1PMy97zxV34/s200/Baxter_head_small.JPG" /></a></div> <P>
Good morning, blog readers! Our Mood Kyrie today is actually a Mood Baxter. Bax is a pup from Kyrie's second litter. He is growing into a very handsome young fellow! This photo was taken when he was about a year old.
<P>
As usual, I have been working hard at NaNoWriMo this month. Also as usual, I am behind. I spent the first three days of November covered in puppies out east (well, they don't evaluate themselves, you know?) and the fourth day under the knife, having surgery. Negative fun. Luckily, after the first couple days or so I was well enough to type while propped up in bed!
<P>
I have noticed something interesting about NaNoWriMo. Though I can happily peruse any book on writing I want to in the days leading up to it, once NaNo is here I can not bear to pick up a book on writing! I have also found that I don't read much fiction during NaNo UNLESS it is completely outside of the genre I am currently working in. For example, I'm working very hard on my mythic fantasy West of the Moon right now, and I am reading either non-fiction or mysteries (re-reading some of my favorite Agatha Christie books from my childhood). I find that I have no urge to read fantasy or even SF right now. <P>
As I have worked at my writing the last year or two I have started making a note of habits and tendencies like the above. This is valuable, I think, because like weight loss--and you think I jest, but I have found weight loss to be almost completely about this--writing is about figuring out what your best habits are and working within them, and figuring out what your worst habits are and attempting to avoid them as much as possible. Given that I say this when my diet and exercise regimen has gone completely to blazes thanks to the surgery (no exercise allowed yet, and I am going BONKERS) and the stress of being behind during NaNo (I devour great amounts of comfort food when I am under stress, and the most I can do is try to mitigate the damage). <P>
So this brings me to the second part of this post, which is that during October I had picked up Rachel Aaron's short <a href="http://thisblogisaploy.blogspot.com/2011/06/how-i-went-from-writing-2000-words-day.html">"How I Went From Writing 2,000 Words a Day to 10,000 Words a Day"</a> and decided to make a run at doing some of the things she mentions in there. <P>
There are three things that Rachel talks about as the key features in how she began to put out vast quantities of verbiage. Put very succinctly, these are: <P>
1. discover the features of your most productive writing time; <P>
2. write the scenes you are in love with; and <p>
3. spend five to thirty minutes before you write making a detailed outline of the scene(s) you'll be working on. In other words, know what you'll be writing before you write it.<P>
Now, every writer is different and many things that work for some are disastrous for others, but I set out to try Rachel's advice because I was curious. I am pretty right-brained at times, and I love statistics. So what could be more interesting than charting my writing productivity? I followed Rachel's suggestion and set up a spreadsheet. There were spaces to note the times when I started and stopped writing, my total words and average words per hour, whether I had been interrupted and by what (thus letting me know how disruptive those interruptions had been), and I also put in a few other spaces--where I had been writing, music or no, whether I had been prepared (i.e. did I know what I would be writing in detail before I jumped in) and which project and scene I had been working on.
<P>After a couple weeks of tracking, the results have been eye-opening.
<P>First, she was completely right that when I was working on a scene that I loved or that I was looking forward to for a long time--the "gravy scenes" to use my own term--I was a MUCH faster writer. There is a scene in <i>West of the Moon</i> that I envisioned all the way back at the start of <i>East of the Sun</i>. It sprung into my head and I loved it instantly. I couldn't wait to write it. But at that time I was stubbornly sticking to "write the book in order" more or less, so I put it off. Well, this week, I FINALLY came to it. And, using Rachel's other tools (like writing during my most productive time of day) I broke a new speed record for myself: over 2,000 words an hour. Wow! <P>
Also, I found that point three did help me. Especially if I was headed for a scene where I didn't quite know where I was going yet, if I wrote some detailed notes in my longhand journal about what things I wanted in the scene before I sat down to write it, I never stalled. I still wrote slower because I was feeling my way, but I always could look at my notes and know what came next. And the outlining didn't seem to make my writing stale; instead, it freed me up to relax, and I came up with some new material while writing one of these scenes that delighted me. So even if you outline, there is still room for your characters to surprise you! <P>
But the most interesting discovery came from my spreadsheet. I am a diehard Morning Person. I wake up perky, alert, and bouncy in the morning. I would have bet money that writing in the morning would be my most productive time. BUT NO. The spreadsheet showed me that I was actually balky, hesitant and distracted when I tried to write in the morning! I don't think there was ever a morning point where I broke 750 words an hour. But in the early afternoon my focus improved, and that carried through all the way until I started to get fatigued--around 8 or 9 pm. So my peak writing time is actually between 12 p.m. and 8 or 9 p.m. <P>
I would NEVER have guessed this without the spreadsheet. Once I realized it, I put it to the test. I worked on my novel only during my key times all of this week, and, even though I've returned to work this week, I've done between 2,000 and 3,200 words per day every single day. I'm within around 3K words of catching up completely now, and we've only just passed the midpoint. In fact, I've decided I won't be happy with just 50K words this year--I'm aiming to end significantly higher, and to be within range of completing <i>West of the Moon</i> entirely by the end of this month. <P>
So this is why you find me blogging now--it's not noon yet, so I haven't hit my super-productive time. Way to rationalize a blog update, huh? I hope that y'all will head over to Rachel Aaron's blog to check out her system. I've linked to it above. She also sells a short e-book of that title, with that blog entry expanded, where she goes into more detail into her writing methods. Check it out! And thanks, Rachel, for giving me some new tools to improve on and explore my writing. :)Anne F.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14442385165430082302noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825513800929037011.post-90971032584857060742013-10-15T10:24:00.000-07:002013-10-15T10:24:17.015-07:00Darkwriting<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEilPvj24eMtG0P5PC6RBnQlswbBniNe9-wRr6CJAnVaTow8_-56y-QFnpzskyAOKYLVUC5KwqPyu60JSYnEC-5g9LZ88ERk3cOeo1yzv63iAv-9ivdV9jGMWxvKDQ38eDQYsr4Unu05qVg/s1600/Kyriewithmom_blog.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEilPvj24eMtG0P5PC6RBnQlswbBniNe9-wRr6CJAnVaTow8_-56y-QFnpzskyAOKYLVUC5KwqPyu60JSYnEC-5g9LZ88ERk3cOeo1yzv63iAv-9ivdV9jGMWxvKDQ38eDQYsr4Unu05qVg/s200/Kyriewithmom_blog.jpg" /></a></div><P>
Since I'm playing catch-up with the blog this week (posts I meant to do weeks ago), I decided that the mood Kyrie for this one would be a retro-Mood Kyrie! This is a picture of Kyrie as a little pup with me on the very first day we got her. :) <P>
Fast-forward to a day around four weeks ago when I bent over to get a frisbee for Kyrie's daughter Blazie. Unfortunately, Blazie was trotting back toward me at the time, and we ran into each other. More specifically, Blazie's rock-hard forehead rammed me in the temple. By that evening we knew that I'd suffered a mild concussion. <P>
It's taken me these four weeks to recover fully. During the first three I was unable to look at TV's, computer screens, or my iPhone without pain. I couldn't go to the grocery store without having panic attacks (complex visual things are very bad when you're concussed). I was unable to read books, and even audiobooks (which some concussed people have no problem with) made me hurt for the first week or so. When I was able to go back to my job, I had to turn out most lights in my department and spend a lot of time sitting quietly in the near-dark between batches of work. <P>
Needless to say, this was not only boring, but extremely frustrating! I had a new story in progress that I was excited about, and I couldn't work on it. I had been trying to establish a routine for upcoming NaNaWriMo in November--now scrapped for who knew how many weeks. Out of annoyance I set my computer screen brightness to zero and typed without heeding spelling or spacing errors. Thus the title of this post. After, I went back and fixed things (once I could look at a computer screen without wincing). Here is what I wrote:<P>
"I walk around at work with my eyes squinted shut--AND sunglasses on, because even with my eyes almost closed, the light feels too bright. I think I have the tiniest bit of understanding now of what a blind person feels like. I find myself counting the steps to the corner by the time clock so I can walk the whole thing with my eyes completely closed. I get very annoyed when people leave things on the floor out in the aisles for me to stumble over. At home, the fridge light is so bright to me that I close my eyes and concentrate on the feel of the glass in my fingers to try to judge when the cold water is almost to the top. <P>
The biggest spur to creativity is to be told that you can NOT exercise it. I itch to work on projects I began just before this happened. My new short story cries to be finished. I tried to do this to it, writing it with the monitor black, and got a few sentences, but it's not the same. I'm a visual person. I like to commune with my words as I write them. <P>
Ideas pour into my brain with no outlet. I tried to make myself work on my drawing today, but it was too much. The more I push, the longer my recovery time, I'm told. <P>
I forced myself to get back to work in my second week, but can't do more than three or four hours before I go home, exhausted (or having panic attacks from too much visual stimulation). <P>
I can not wait until this is over. I am terribly glad that it WILL be over, that this is temporary. How would it feel to lose my sight permanently? The thought terrifies me. <P>
I am making these notes because I know that some day I'll use this in a story or a book. Future me: never underestimate the amount of frustration an active, creative person feels when they simply can not do what they are used to. Never take for granted the ability to act upon your desires with no (physical) limitations." <P>Anne F.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14442385165430082302noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825513800929037011.post-43611490916627429202013-09-04T18:40:00.000-07:002013-09-04T18:40:48.880-07:00Pics from WorldCon 2013<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjOwh5jgVgGc4v22zVvj-k4vNAbmQTF0aSDAEKYIAdaRexfGcnuwQW-ojtKT7P9uAHL5EipKL1U1aztyy4PXw0eFKfGqfzMfqnDwbGGnE89_1cdGU0LYFaiW6Pa_S1Dbf1jsYylnLfRBGM/s1600/NightAlamo.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjOwh5jgVgGc4v22zVvj-k4vNAbmQTF0aSDAEKYIAdaRexfGcnuwQW-ojtKT7P9uAHL5EipKL1U1aztyy4PXw0eFKfGqfzMfqnDwbGGnE89_1cdGU0LYFaiW6Pa_S1Dbf1jsYylnLfRBGM/s400/NightAlamo.JPG" /></a></div>
<P>Just a few photos from WorldCon 2013, as promised. Above, the Alamo at night. Below, the Con-Tail (what my badge looked like--though Helsinki lost the bid for 2015 to Spokane, WA). Note that the most enthusiastic Con-goers had built triangular constructs (con-structs?) of over thirty badges in three rows. I am a noob. <P>
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Below, George R.R. Martin and Games of Thrones' Rory McCann do a ninja-signing added for limited numbers at the last minute. HBO was nice enough to import Rory from Scotland for the Con. He is just as tall and imposing in person as he is when playing The Hound on-screen--an impression somewhat mitigated when he attempted to drink the bottle of GoT "Take the Black Stout" I gave him to sign, and again when he showed up in the snazziest kilt ever to the Hugo awards ceremonies. Bottom line: this photo is of two Really Cool Guys. ;) <P>
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Below, a couple of shots of beer, pun-intended. Way too much of that at WorldCon, by the way--though I did manage to avoid the ghost-pepper-vodka cocktails. First, the row of Game-of-Thrones-licensed stouts and pale ales at the Brotherhood Without Banners Private party. Behind, you can see "Bros" frenziedly opening large bottles to pour and serve everyone. Ommegang brewing sent two cases of beer just for the party!<P>
Below that, you can see my autographed bottle of Take the Black Stout. Rory signed across the tree, George on the lower right side. Certainly the coolest empty beer bottle we have owned! <P>
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At the BWB party, George's wife Parris supervises The Great Beering: <P>
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<P>Finally, the awesome little pins devised by our friend (and GRRM-minion) Raya Golden for the Brotherhood Without Banners party--sold to benefit the BWB. A stylized representation of the House of Black and White insignia, also featured on this year's BWB t-shirt. <P>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjOnqtsvyXDL4FCRHMKSIHnZwedd2ujMo-rw6z4Kv7SZClkmYw6XBkCYSWOSgedMlph6vawBeX9x49uvNSuFFGcWiUW2Mmus0wlt7umAWb7uimJ7IuSgTI8d33Prz_TdqUaGtoSGHlk6C0/s1600/BnWPin.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjOnqtsvyXDL4FCRHMKSIHnZwedd2ujMo-rw6z4Kv7SZClkmYw6XBkCYSWOSgedMlph6vawBeX9x49uvNSuFFGcWiUW2Mmus0wlt7umAWb7uimJ7IuSgTI8d33Prz_TdqUaGtoSGHlk6C0/s400/BnWPin.JPG" /></a></div>
<P>Thanks for reading, all, and I hope you enjoyed the photos! Sorry I didn't get more--will try to be better next time. :)Anne F.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14442385165430082302noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825513800929037011.post-13257027603185831092013-09-02T21:07:00.000-07:002013-09-02T21:07:39.707-07:00WorldCon 2013 - San Antonio<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQbDL43NFdFVAGeF8eICKKU7-WGTo2LiuSo2UcxFGOObOETsqWTQCS4eXUORJ3Hlt-qRSGoHrRjGwUubel8Vh0ft0NBK216EK_tSdVXzsK41eWZcWyPzdIDLgAruox2PChBCLS-kUE2Po/s1600/MoodKyrie_beautiful.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQbDL43NFdFVAGeF8eICKKU7-WGTo2LiuSo2UcxFGOObOETsqWTQCS4eXUORJ3Hlt-qRSGoHrRjGwUubel8Vh0ft0NBK216EK_tSdVXzsK41eWZcWyPzdIDLgAruox2PChBCLS-kUE2Po/s200/MoodKyrie_beautiful.JPG" /></a></div>
This past weekend my husband and I attended the 2013 WorldCon in San Antonio. We got back about two hours ago, but the whole thing has been affecting enough that I wanted to sit down and write about my experience. <P>
First off, I've never before attended a WorldCon, and this is only my second Sci-Fi Con (the first being AggieCon earlier this year). I don't know why I haven't before. It's probably a combination of two things.
<P>First, I work for a miniatures company. Being so involved with games cons (Gen Con, ReaperCon, Origins, etc.), most of the time Sci-fi cons or fan cons were off my radar. I just looked at them with a quizzical head-tilt and wondered "what do they do there?"
<p>Second, ridiculous as it sounds, there was some fear of just not fitting in with the people who attended. If I allow myself to actually think about it for a full second, that is a goddamn silly thing to think for a woman who grew up watching Dr. Who and Star Trek and who started reading Anne McCaffrey and Piers Anthony at age 8 or 9.
<P>I can blame my newfound Con involvement almost entirely on Parris McBride (and I suspect I am not the only one who can say that!). Parris LOVES fandom and conventions. She met her now-husband George R.R. Martin at the Cons, long before <i>Game of Thrones</i>. Parris was always asking me (and then Zak, my husband) if we were going to attend AggieCon or WorldCon. AggieCon is always in Texas, but WorldCon moves to a different city worldwide every year. This year the city was San Antonio. <P>
At first I was skeptical. And that's an understatement. I have a busy life. I have to partition my spare time carefully. And, as I said, there were doubts number one and two sitting there in my head. But AggieCon would be short, and pretty inexpensive to attend. And George was the Guest of Honor. Sure, I'll go! <P>
Long story short, Zak and I had such a great time that we ended up texting our dog-sitter and begging him to watch the dogs for an extra day so we could stay longer than we'd planned! <P>
So, suddenly WorldCon was on the table. And to my surprise, it was my husband suggesting that we go!
<P>I think almost anyone who's written science fiction or fantasy has at one point dreamed of the Hugo awards. There are others--the Nebula, the World Fantasy Awards--but the Hugo was the first. Many of my idols, the authors who I most adored as a kid (C.J. Cherryh, for one) were Hugo-award-winners. If we went to WorldCon we could vote for the Hugos! Wow! That sold me. Getting to vote was really cool. <P>
Second, George and Parris were going, and their minion Raya who has become a good friend. George was nominated for a Hugo for <i>The Battle of Blackwater</i> episode from Games of Thrones on HBO. So between them (though we knew that George would be incredibly busy) and many of my Viable Paradise instructors who were attending, at least I knew some people. <P>
And there were panels and seminars about all sorts of writing stuff. Lovely! I would have things to do. <P>
Well...turns out I wasn't quite prepared for how MUCH I had to do!
<P>Every morning I would haul myself out of bed (sometimes after having put myself into bed at a gawdawful early hour and after several-too-many Shiner Bocks), stagger downstairs, stuff breakfast/brunch into myself and then take off for three to five HOURS of panel discussions. Then we would meet people for dinner. Or we would go out by ourselves, just Zak and I, and have fun realizing which of our favorite authors were at the next table!
<P>I met up with a couple of my Viable Paradise classmates, Sean and Jake (thanks for the awesome dinner invite, Jake! We had a blast!). I was able to touch base and at least say hello to almost all of my VP instructors who were there, and a couple of them (Teresa Nielsen-Hayden and SFWA President Steven Gould) were generous with their time. BIG thanks to Steven and Laura Mixon for a few moments of their time today before they left Steven's signing. Our talk was inspirational, and it left me fired up to continue to improve my writing. :) <P>
<P>The Hugo awards were terribly fun and it was even more fantastic to see friends and instructors win!! My instructor Elizabeth Bear won for her SF Squeecast podcast, Patrick Nielsen-Hayden for his excellent editing, and John Scalzi won the coveted Hugo for Best Novel (YAY Scalzi! Zak and I both voted for you!). :) Plus, George won for Blackwater!! A phenomenal night, so much fun. <P>
<P>I walked away from this WorldCon with:<P>
A very long chain of colorful ribbons attached to my badge (they call it "con-beard" but I am calling it "con-tail", as in pony-tail, because I am female, dammit)<P>
Many new friends in the Brotherhood Without Banners fan club for George R.R. Martin. We wore many of their ribbons, a couple of their t-shirts, and the awesome pins designed by Raya Golden! We have also made some fantastic new friends. Thank you all so much for welcoming Zak and I into your circle! <P>
A bottle of Ommegang brewing's Game-of-Thrones-licensed "Take the Black Stout" which I got to drink at the private Brotherhood party and then have both George and actor Rory McCann (who plays the Hound in the HBO series) autograph the next day; <P>
SIXTEEN PAGES of notes from my panel discussions <P>
Renewed acquaintance with many of my VP instructors <P>
Did I mention "new friends"? Not only the BWB peeps but we met some wonderful people at the dinner Jake Kerr invited us to. :) <P>
A big respect for what it takes to organize a big international event. Organizing ReaperCon is a cakewalk compared to this. <P>
A flood of inspiration and ideas on things to improve in my own writing;
<P>And finally, last but not least, a husband who says that *maybe* we can get ourselves to WorldCon 2014...in London!!! <P>
Pics or it didn't happen? Of course! Check back tomorrow...<P>
Anne F.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14442385165430082302noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825513800929037011.post-54671148602620979242013-08-26T20:22:00.001-07:002013-08-26T20:22:10.015-07:00The Learning Curve<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjLn8y1KCsYIWaAwjY_LpJ_wvSe_rf5n_5yTxH_I-VNIRNq9PkohMXlECXS2RhRsI7xjP8PwGhfCCjMDewjsQ1GsDBrtFX-KEsJoa9GotvQXEpBVSYLQLBoa-WHIJz3-M6UfCJQMyXcjpA/s1600/MoodKyrie_bone.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjLn8y1KCsYIWaAwjY_LpJ_wvSe_rf5n_5yTxH_I-VNIRNq9PkohMXlECXS2RhRsI7xjP8PwGhfCCjMDewjsQ1GsDBrtFX-KEsJoa9GotvQXEpBVSYLQLBoa-WHIJz3-M6UfCJQMyXcjpA/s200/MoodKyrie_bone.JPG" /></a></div>
Pensive Mood Kyrie says, "I suppose you're wondering why I've called you all here today..."
<p>(Okay, not really. Really Mood Kyrie was saying, "You're not thinking of taking my bone, are you?")
<P>Being in a thoughtful mood this evening, and having promised a new blog entry, and having been remiss in my bloggerly duties (I know, not a real word, but "bloggerly" is pretty awesome even so), I am here now to talk about the learning curve of writing. <P>
This isn't about the four million words of crap you supposedly have to write. (Or was it one million? I've lost count. And anyway I always assumed that, like swing dancing, I would take four times as long to learn the same steps as everyone else.) Rather it is about how you work so hard, you're getting good feedback, you think you've gotten better, you're starting to feel encouraged...<P>
And then you read something else and realize you're not even partway up the mountain--you're barely in the foothills. <P>
In the last year I've been learning a lot. I realized that I would have no idea how to set about editing my novel, for one thing. So I wrote a bunch of short stories and tried to figure out how a short story actually works. Harder than it seems, by the way, as I am the sort of reader who hasn't really sought out short stories. I am much more fond of novels. And my writing resembles noveling. Which is fine until you realize that you're writing a short story, not a novel. <P>
But I digress.<P>
The point is that I think I have finally figured out how a short story actually works, and in attempting to edit my own hopelessly sprawling short fiction I managed to learn enough about self-editing to feel that I wouldn't make a total hash of the rewrite/editing of my novel. I honestly can say I would have had no idea about how to even begin to edit _East of the Sun_ if I hadn't spent the last year or so battling with short fiction. <P>
I've read some writers who say that short stories really have nothing much in common with novels and that trying to write one to learn more about the other isn't the best use of your time. I would have to disagree. All stories, of whatever length, are about story, after all. For a wordy, rambling writer like me, learning to create a credible story in under eight thousand (the last one was only FIVE thousand! I almost swooned...) words is a very valuable lesson in how to trim the dross off of your fiction.
<P>
So. I have successfully slimmed my stories. I have gotten some very encouraging rejections from Strange Horizons, Beneath Ceaseless Skies, and even Tor.com. I am starting to feel like I might just write something very soon that someone might want to buy.
<P>Then I went to the bookstore this past weekend and picked up Elizabeth George's _Write Away_. It's less a how-to and more an exploration of her own writing process. I find that stuff fascinating and have always loved George's mysteries--like my other fav P.D. James, she's a master of the literary mystery. Her characterizations and prose are deep and fluid enough to drown in.
<P>This, however, along with being a wonderful read, exposed to my poor beginning-writer brain exactly where in the foothills of writing I was. It was like plotting my course with a topographical map and compass, and then getting cell phone reception and glancing at the GPS and finding out that you might, perhaps, have taken a wrong turn at Albuquerque.
<P>To be fair, not a wrong turn...just that you weren't as far along as you thought. There are always those wake-up calls where you realize that you have a lot to learn yet, and this is one of those.
<P>On the one hand, I am ever so much better at the writing craft than I was two or three years ago. On the other hand, I am realizing that the learning curve for writing (like other forms of art that I have practiced) is two things.
<p>First, it is actually a very gradual slope. A little epiphany here, a jump in logic there, a phrase that triggers a little light in the brain along a little farther there.
<p>However, it is an INFINITE slope with many different trails. And no matter how far along you think you are in one moment, in the next you will turn around and read something that seems to expand the accordion of your brain (with accompanying wheezing and settling dust). I think that even seasoned authors must do that--they must read other authors and just have a moment of pause where they're like, "Well. THAT was well done." And maybe, for a second, they wish they'd written it.<P>
At least, that's what I'm telling myself. I am also going back to re-read that damn book this weekend. And this time, like the student I am, I am taking notes.Anne F.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14442385165430082302noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825513800929037011.post-26347558488816376402013-02-27T07:42:00.001-08:002013-02-27T07:42:24.171-08:00Delving the Past<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-CMKM9Di5lVyyubW3U_9yVFJlCeD31L-ZTWCATe8yb3QSBxjVBBh8ZlnbUasRfuZ2j3-i5TNr974Ohz2HpHmjIvueHcbXtPW5qvkiznkM7Sq1MRUQQvBuyT9uP1SHlC-rbO6K5Ev8n8U/s1600/Kyrie_8weeks.jpg" imageanchor="1" ><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-CMKM9Di5lVyyubW3U_9yVFJlCeD31L-ZTWCATe8yb3QSBxjVBBh8ZlnbUasRfuZ2j3-i5TNr974Ohz2HpHmjIvueHcbXtPW5qvkiznkM7Sq1MRUQQvBuyT9uP1SHlC-rbO6K5Ev8n8U/s320/Kyrie_8weeks.jpg" /></a> <p>
Since today's post is about the past, our Mood Kyrie is a photo of Kyrie at eight weeks. Heck of cute, no? <P>
Today I was reminded why, in this age of technology and instantly-searchable documents, it is both exceedingly annoying and contemplatively useful to keep a journal that I actually WRITE in rather than type in.<P>
I finished editing a short story last night (it's called <i>Grim Thunder</i>, for future reference), and it's about to start making the submission rounds. I needed a new project. One of my previous story ideas sat up in my head and said, "ME!" <P>
Okay, sure, I can do that. Wait. Hmmm. <P>
Almost all of my useful notes and scenes on that story are written in my journal. <P>
Ummm. WHICH journal, ridiculous writerly self? You have filled FOUR of them in the last three years! <P>
So today I went journal-delving, and managed to find a couple of key scenes that I needed to refresh me on where I was going with the story, though not the one I really wanted--yet! However, in the doing of it I found some interesting thoughts of mine from a couple years back and I thought that I would share them. <P>
First was that even two years ago I knew that beginnings were my worst part of a story. I have a horrendous urge to start contemplative instead of with action, and if you don't know the character it seems to me that there's little to recommend a story that starts with their inner thoughts unless those thoughts are so traumatic or fascinating that you keep reading with a "WTF?" kind of attitude until the writer lets you figure it out. Or maybe you're C.J. Cherryh, in which case you can write a whole series full of convoluted yet somehow fascinating thoughts and yet I still keep reading (<i>Foreigner,</i> anyone?). But even then the first book started with action, so I guess that rule stands. <P>
But, in the immortal words of Byron, I digress.
I had in my journal a thought about why beginnings are so hard for me, and perhaps there's some truth in it. In my favorite genre, setting the scene is also necessarily setting the setting, and I grew up in the 80's when it seemed like all those lovely high fantasies started with meandering, thoughtful prologues that were really mental background paintings full of backstory. I guess in a movie it would be like that long panning shot at the beginning, or what <i>Save the Cat</i> calls the Opening Image. <P>
But a long panning shot doesn't belong in a short story. It takes up too much room. So when I get my contemplative groove on I tend to founder in the surf instead of striking boldly off into the waves. <P>
The good thing is, I've recognized this since, and I think I've managed to overcome this tendency. So writing such things in my journal does seem to work, eventually.<P>
The second thing I read I found very interesting because it was directly related to Anne's First Rule, Don't Judge the Work. I jotted a thought that a writer reading their own reviews was poison. The reason was that in reading those critiques, it necessarily opened the door in the back of the writer's head and invited self-criticism. We spend so much time trying to lock up our Inner Editors, to just write and not to bog down in self-doubt. Even though the story being reviewed would have been published, I think that unless all the reviews were glowing (which would never happen to people in Real Life except to those people that we really do not like--channeling Anne LaMott, there...), it would still cause more harm than good. <P>
So those are your thoughts for the day. Now it's back to delving through the other three journals, trying to find that pesky scene...<P>
p.s. yes I know I could just rewrite it from memory. IF I remembered it. Unfortunately, I only remember it exists. Aye, there's the rub.
Anne F.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14442385165430082302noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825513800929037011.post-47670834659584176152012-11-12T11:12:00.001-08:002012-11-12T11:12:01.809-08:00The Best Rejection I Ever Got<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiX6YFy-sYrnyvh0-miT9GrM7DYoi01f7mE6Iq7Y_52qinOAqQWhl590ESdkflcmHOR8IPomC-EQpZX8xZZw7-3Afi2p6BC08_e0CF9dYLh0f6nspzDXn3iZh0WTd5L2VDMAf8P8EFbSpU/s1600/Kyrie_avatar.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear:left; float:left;margin-right:1em; margin-bottom:1em"><img border="0" height="182" width="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiX6YFy-sYrnyvh0-miT9GrM7DYoi01f7mE6Iq7Y_52qinOAqQWhl590ESdkflcmHOR8IPomC-EQpZX8xZZw7-3Afi2p6BC08_e0CF9dYLh0f6nspzDXn3iZh0WTd5L2VDMAf8P8EFbSpU/s200/Kyrie_avatar.JPG" /></a></div>
Well I never thought I'd be pleased to get rejected, but sure enough, when I got my latest rejection for Areb Dar yesterday, it was a happy occasion. Am I losing my sanity? Well, yes. Think about it. This story has been subject to no less than ten partial re-writes and countless small editing binges. If I hadn't sacrificed a few brain cells to it along the way it wouldn't have made progress, right? Or maybe I'm comparing it to some sort of literary Cthulhu-spawn (which might not be too far off the mark anyway). <P>
But, as Byron said, I digress. <P>
In summary, many thanks to Brit Mandelo at <i>Strange Horizons</i> magazine for taking the time out of a busy schedule to personally respond in detail when my story was rejected. Thanks to you and your fellow editors' feedback I have a very good idea of where my weaknesses are and I'm encouraged to try again with a different story in the future. :) <P>
Anne F.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14442385165430082302noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825513800929037011.post-61271178831685587522012-11-07T11:11:00.000-08:002012-11-07T11:11:43.678-08:00Fear<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjeF5qFOEchx1iH-AxjwWO2F1GphTpW7PbS9dZmMAEaU4oV-ijOCNyLO-Z8G90WZtX9w4cAsaS6qP5BJRa6MucF-fM3VhaEh1ihaoTpQ-Ts-EKI0SVYr_VwYJ7FOfzHKwVJAf4b8f0vBn8/s1600/kyrietwinklesmall.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear:left; float:left;margin-right:1em; margin-bottom:1em"><img border="0" height="200" width="165" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjeF5qFOEchx1iH-AxjwWO2F1GphTpW7PbS9dZmMAEaU4oV-ijOCNyLO-Z8G90WZtX9w4cAsaS6qP5BJRa6MucF-fM3VhaEh1ihaoTpQ-Ts-EKI0SVYr_VwYJ7FOfzHKwVJAf4b8f0vBn8/s200/kyrietwinklesmall.JPG" /></a></div>
A while back I was wanting to write a post on fear. And my friend Gwen who has an awesome blog in her own right asked me to do a guest post. And so my post on fear was written, and published--and I completely forgot to link to it here. Dang it. <p>
So, better late than never:<P>
<a href="http://eatingmoney.wordpress.com/2012/08/10/guest-post-anne-becker-on-fear-and-writing/">Me, On Fear And Writing</a> <P>
I hope that, if it resonates with you, you go right now and sit down and do something creative that brings you closer to your life goals. <P>
Enjoy! :)Anne F.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14442385165430082302noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825513800929037011.post-85473762448532483372012-11-07T09:53:00.000-08:002012-11-07T09:54:21.653-08:00A Long Education From A (Relatively) Short Story<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Today's Mood Puppy is a Mood Saber from our first litter, pictured here all grown up at a year old. I feel like my writing is growing up, too, in important ways, and I owe it all to a very difficult short story. <P>
It took me a long time to develop enough of an eye to see the flaws in my writing. The short story I workshopped at Viable Paradise in 2010 was the main tool of that learning, and it occurred to me last night that I was lucky that I did put all that time into it instead of something else. Here's why. <P>
Areb Dar (the short story) went through at least five major edit/rewrite/revisions and countless small tunings. All while I was working on finishing the raw rough draft of my first novel and writing the roughs of other stories and mapping out the next novel, I also would take the old story out here and there and futz with it. When I got useful or specific feedback from my rejections, I re-examined the story in that light and tightened it. Those of you who have read my previous posts on this subject know that it was by turns frustrating, exhausting, and sometimes outright depressing to keep going back. <P>
Yet I did--because I really believed in the story. I believed in what it was in my head when it was born, and in what it could be.<P>
There are a lot of sources that say that once you start sending a story out you should just do so. You've surely read it, that advise against stopping to edit between submissions. I have to argue with that, because during those early submissions, I sensed that the story was still not quite there. At the same time, I did not yet have enough experience, enough of a feel for my craft, to pinpoint how to fix it. The time that elapsed between submissions and the feedback I got and the work that I was doing on my novel was invaluable toward fueling the back burner that the pot of this story simmered on (and it was always simmering, somewhere in the back of my head). <P>
When I finished the most recent draft of Areb Dar, in October, I sent it to all the beta readers who had seen earlier versions for final feedback. Somewhere in that last set of revisions, something clicked in me and when I read it over I knew that I had leveled up. I was finally happy with the story--or as happy as I would ever be with it at that length. (6200 words, for those wondering. I still think it has enough potential complexity to fuel a novel in the future, but for now I'm not going there.)<P>
So how exactly was I lucky? Well, think about it. Last night I was working on my second novel. I was also jotting down scenes and ideas for editing the first novel. Between paragraphs, it suddenly occurred to me: what kind of shape would I be in, going to edit East of the Sun, if I had not grown so much via working on Areb Dar? It was hell at times, working with the short story--and the novel is twenty times as long, and much more complex. I imagined, for a moment, how lost and depressed I might have become if I hadn't cut my teeth on those 6200 words. <P>
So despite the fact that Areb Dar is not yet published, and may not be ever (such is the gamble of the freelance writer), I am currently thanking my lucky stars for the long education I got from my short fiction. Areb Dar, you have been a bastard of a story to work on, but I love you. <P>
Now get published, dammit. I want you out of the house! Anne F.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14442385165430082302noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825513800929037011.post-51749998851988273052012-10-15T13:27:00.001-07:002012-10-15T13:27:11.787-07:00Tightening the Prose<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Well here I've been, chugging along--and getting discouraged. I've spent a while now sending out one particular story, as y'all know. I've been fighting with this story a good long time. I've never liked the beginning; I've known from feedback that it was the weakest part of things. Yet I couldn't see my way through to how I should make it better, and for a while there, I stalled out of everything. <P>
It has always been my tendency to "write long". My first drafts are meandering; I let my brain play with images, let myself restate things a couple times in different ways in the hopes of teasing out a gem or two that I might really like. Much like my vocal chatter, there is never a problem with not having enough! In my novel, this meandering helped me keep going through scenes, and later I got a better idea how to attack some of them. But in short stories, long is a detriment. Short stories need to be tight, close, breathing-in-your-ear kind of intense so they can distract you and suck you in quickly and keep things moving. There is no room for meandering, no room for flights of prose. I was beginning to feel like I was thrashing around, going nowhere useful. I felt like short stories were going to beat me. <P>
And I couldn't let that happen. In my genre, getting a story or fifteen published is a good way to break in. I love my novel--and previous published stories to my name might give it a better chance. I needed to get over this short story issue. I sensed it was a big block in my writing. <P>
Bad beginnings and writing too long--so how were these related? Where's the breakthrough? <P>
Breakthrough there was. I took a short road trip this weekend and long periods in the car have always helped me free-associate ideas. So it came to me--a way I could cut out that pesky beginning in Areb Dar entirely, a way I could pick up at the first scene I really liked. AND I could cut out some of the chaff from later on if I could combine two other scenes and slot the substance of them in together! <P>
Yes, this is a simple concept. Making your scene do double or even triple duty--instead of three weaker scenes, try to figure out a way to accomplish the same thing in one. Voila! Your prose tightens. Things move faster! And tension tends to rise, because you're not meandering. <P>
This idea is discussed in many writing books and forums. But as with many things, you can understand the idea in your head and still not get it at a gut level! <P>
I finally clicked on it yesterday. I stopped at a rest stop on the way home and scribbled notes. I woke up this morning and I began to CHOP. And to rewrite. And for the first time in a long time, it felt good to come to the page.
Anne F.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14442385165430082302noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825513800929037011.post-77924737304177525082012-08-02T11:04:00.000-07:002012-08-02T11:04:22.899-07:00Nothing's Wasted (Except Possibly the Writing Buddies)<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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(Your Mood Kyrie today is being temporarily supplanted by a Mood Blazie. Blazie is Kyrie's daughter out of our last litter. We'll be keeping her, so I thought an introduction was in order. Plus, she is nine weeks old and Cute.)<P>
I have historically been split on the idea of writing buddies.<P>
When I was a kid I was still in that foolish frame of mind that said you should never tell anyone your ideas because they might steal them. I suppose that concept finds ready soil in the self-centered mind of a twelve-year-old (and some of us never quite shake it!). I wrote in solitude—and in longhand, a habit which I still turn to when I'm having trouble with a scene or sentence.<P>
In high school I learned the joy of hanging out with someone else who loved writing. Paul was a poet, and we would challenge each other by passing long notes full of our latest efforts or excerpts from song lyrics we especially liked between classes. It was, for the first time, fun to experience a sense of community and to think that maybe having someone else around to help one focus was a good thing. It certainly did make me productive. I don't have any of those poems anymore, but I do remember quite a few of them and the images sneak into my fiction every once in a while. Now I wish I'd kept more of them. I am always learning that as a writer, nothing is ever wasted.<P>
In college, and afterward, I backslid. I went to writing as to a refuge—a refuge from friend drama, from relationship stress, from the undermining doubt about where I was and what I was going to end up with in this education thing—and whether it was even what I wanted to have (I was an art major—such doubts are warranted). When emotion storms tried to swamp my boat I made a beeline for the computer. I wrote solo, in the dark, by candlelight if possible (another habit that remains with me today if I'm having difficulty with a very atmospheric or emotional scene).<P>
After a series of low-level supervisory and management jobs (during which I did my best to dig out a short story or The Novel and try hacking away at it again, sporadically) I said screw it all and moved to the east coast to try my hand at being an artist. Much to my surprise, I succeeded (at the cost of much of my sanity, and my credit rating). After a brief bounce back with the parents, my level of newly-developed skill and niche painting fame won me my current job. All those years and fears and here I ended up an artist anyway. But…I still wanted the writing thing.<P>
And so when I met a couple of writer friends down here who actually worked at stuff and occasionally finished it (instead of abandoning projects for months or even years as was my habit), I started hanging out with them and talking writing. Strangely, this led to actually writing. And then, to actually attempting NaNoWriMo (and failing; I still hadn't given myself permission to write absolutely horrid first drafts). And then to working on new stories. And to WINNING NaNoWriMo. And finally to finishing stories, and getting accepted to Viable Paradise XIV (thus giving me MORE potential writing buddies!), and then finishing my first real novel this year. <P>
During the course of all of this, with hindsight being the type to walk up and smack a girl in the face, I have noticed a few things about support and writing buddies that I wish I would have known back in college. They might have slid me a few inches further along the tightrope. In that spirit, I offer them here.<P>
1. <b>Share Your Ideas (but not too much).</b> There is a fine line between talking over a new concept with a buddy and sliding into ONLY talking about the project and never actually working on it. My current writing buddy and I often get around the most dangerous point of this by only mentioning the project after we've started it. After that we bring up things that we're specifically happy with or having trouble with as we progress. It's just enough to get some feedback, to keep us moving, and to make us go back and dip our brains into the story if we've been neglecting it.<P>
2. <b> Try Writing Communally.</b> This doesn't work for everyone and there are days it doesn't even work for us, when people are just too distracted and the rest of us let them pull us into the Happy Land of Cat Waxing. But done right, in true NaNoWriMo style, you get a couple (or a gang!) of friends together and you set a writing challenge—either a certain number of words or a time limit. We do time limits, and then compare word counts at the end of the half hour or hour. This absolutely guarantees that you WILL be productive, dammit, or by God you will be shamed. And you should NEVER underestimate the motivational value of potential shame.<P>
3. <b> Try Setting a Writing Night.</b> Life happens. Stuff distracts us. And the evil doubting Inner Editor wants us to believe that our writing is never as important as the other stuff in our lives. Well, bullhooey! Try giving your Inner Editor a good kick in the chops by scheduling a weekly Writing Night! This has really worked for me, because I'm a terminally busy person. Unless I hound myself it is way too easy for a day to slip by (oh, I'll make it up tomorrow) and then another day (well dang it, there's the weekend, right?) and then the weekend attacks (news at ten) and all the days after become a blur and writing has gone out of my head again (until I get really grouchy and depressed and it takes me half a day to realize that it's because I haven't written in two weeks). Writing Night MAKES me sit down and touch base with my current project at least once a week. At which point, guilt and motivational shame can kick in (see 2, above), especially when paired with writing challenges. And I can ride that momentum for a day or two after, at least—even more if I check in regularly with my writing buddies!<P>
4. <b> Try Never to Consider Yourself Above or Below Your Writing Buddy.</b> Even if you're lucky enough to hang out in a coffeeshop and scribble with the ghost of Ray Bradbury, never let yourself get hung up on it. For a while when writing with my current buddy I was guilty of thinking that I'd progressed farther along in my writing than he is. This is a horrible trap because just because someone is still working on their own writing doesn't mean that they can't see the gaping flaws in yours. And then there are the one or two free cards everyone gets. Buddy one might suck at dialogue but her ideas are fresher; maybe she'll inspire you. Buddy two might create amazing worlds but can't get away from standard fantasy tropes, and you can help each other out if you like to push the boundaries but suck at settings. Buddy three might be Neil Stephenson (if so, I hate you), in which case you may spend most of your writing time together wondering why you find it equally plausible that he could be a college professor at Miskatonic U or the leader of a fanatical cult that performs all their rituals in encrypted mnemonic code (possibly while wearing stylish black leather trenchcoats and katanas). Either way—if you're hung up on how your work compares to the writing of your buddies, chances are you're overlooking a chance to learn something from the people around you (like, why "Clang"?).<P>
But I digress.<P>
At the back of it all, nothing is ever wasted (except perhaps when the North Coast Grand Cru gets opened). Sit down and write with a buddy—in person, in chat, via email—and see how your writing habits might benefit.<P>Anne F.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14442385165430082302noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825513800929037011.post-54330381477412335772012-07-27T20:51:00.000-07:002012-07-27T20:55:43.581-07:00Seeking Obligation (and a Healthy Helping of Shame)<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I've decided not to write the title for this post until I've finished it, because for once I can't settle on one. But if, dear probably-fictional reader, you perused my previous post, you know already that I want to talk about NaNoWriMo tonight. <P>
NaNo's been vilified by some and praised to the skies by others. If you honestly have no idea what it's about, here's the website:<P>
<a href="http://www.nanowrimo.org/">National Novel Writing Month</a> (and they run <a href="http://campnanowrimo.org/">Camp NaNo</a> during the summer, too!)<P>
So, the essence of the argument...does NaNo demean the novel form? Does it not take writing a novel seriously enough? It doesn't really talk about anything like plot structure or convincing dialogue (though these things do get discussed in the community forums, by participants, and certainly in private writing groups like the one I have with my writing buddies). Certainly NaNo does encourage every underhanded trick in the book to inflate your word count (everything from typing pages out of the dictionary to repeating the sentence you just wrote infinitely until you think of a new one!). Word count is king. Not tension or structure or dialogue or believable characters. You dive in and even if you hit your head on a rock you keep going. <P>
I will admit that in many ways I can understand the arguments leveled by the anti-NaNo crowd. After all, is it really laudable to teach people not to just write fiction--but to write mounds and mountains of possibly BAD fiction?? Not like there's a shortage. There's certainly enough of that already floating around. It's like one of those gigantic trash islands meandering around in the Pacific. And I'm sure that I've contributed my share in past NaNoWriMos (dare I recall the horrible plotting in my attempted Urban Fantasy? Though that's less of a sin in that genre than no sex scenes, these days). <P>
NaNo lovers counter that argument by pointing out that because of their beloved Month of Writing Dangerously, more and more kids are getting into writing early. People all over the world converge in November...to write, and to share their experiences writing. People are embracing writing. They are expressing their love of the word and gaining a new appreciation for the books they are reading. So WHAT if the majority of it stinks?? Anne LaMott would remind us that everyone writes shitty first drafts (except for the people that we really, really hate). And, if we do it right, it sets us up with an obligation to succeed. <P>
And it is for this latter reason that I love NaNo, attempt to succeed at NaNo every year, and--in two of those years--even "won" NaNo--which is to say I managed to write 50,000 words or more in 30 days. And now I finally have my title--because it is why NaNo works for me that keeps pulling me back to it. <P>
It's the sense of obligation. It's hard to sustain that, writing purely for me. It's even hard to sustain it when I try to make goals with my local writing buddy Jarrad. But dammit, introduce a community of zillions of people (some of whom actually know me and, I am filled with paranoid certainty, are tracking my progress on the page every day even as I am tracking theirs and swearing under my breath), give me a cute little word-count widget that tracks my progress on a graph, and send me pep talks and give me a website to waste time on, and by all that's holy I'll write. I'll write every day. And if I DON'T write every day then I will bust my ass making up words on the days when I come back to it. Much as I, in fact, am doing on this blog, having missed two days due to puppy-shipping shenanigans. <P>
NaNo doesn't care about my shenanigans. It does not care if I have little puppies chewing my toes off right at this minute. It is still going to point the Mighty Gauss Rifle of Shame at my head, smile, and politely suggest that I am going to look downright pathetic if I don't get my butt in that chair--THIS MINUTE, MISSY--and write. <P>
And I love the dang thing for it. I love the fact that it browbeats me into ignoring my disappointment in myself. ("Woe is me, for I have not written any words for the last three days and am indeed a poor specimen of humanity," I say. "Shut up and catch up," says NaNo.) It short-circuits, for me, the subconscious danger of wallowing in my small failures. And because it is so very effective at that, I end up being more productive than I would have dreamed during the average month of November. <P>
So this past November I used NaNo to get 50K words in on <i>East of the Sun</i> and now in four days I will use it again to start on <i>West of the Moon</i>. I will be counting on the dang thing to shame me into not just 50K, but 100K words this year. With dogs, husband, work, hobbies, friends, art, and video games, that's a helluva lot of shame, folks. And maybe it's the masochist in me. Or the failed Catholic.
<P>But I suspect I'll be enjoying every damn minute.Anne F.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14442385165430082302noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825513800929037011.post-72583887681155992062012-07-24T19:10:00.000-07:002012-07-27T20:56:58.329-07:00Words On Paper: Never a Waste of Time.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<P>It's all Jarrad's fault. <P>
Well, okay, really it's all Gwen's fault, but Jarrad has contributed to that fault by asking me to use our Weekly Writing Night to blog instead of working on actual stories or novels. I probably shouldn't have told him that I'd committed to doing this. Drat.<P>
Jarrad's blog, for those interested (shortly to be updated!): <a href="http://onethousandlives.blogspot.com/">Jarrad, my writing buddy and a guy with a great turn of idea. </a>
<P>So I've got a bone to chew tonight, much like this entry's Mood Kyrie above. That bone to chew is with people who apparently believe that any writing you're doing as a beginning writer has any possibility of being a Waste of Your Time. <P>
I haven't had anyone come out directly and say this, mind you. But when you mention to someone that you have almost finished your first real novel and they are enthused until you mention it's the first of a series--and they get That Look in their eye, and then they open their mouth--then you know what's coming. In this particular circumstance I brightly interposed, "But I'm learning so much!" That seemed to work. But wait. Why should I have had to say that at all? <P>
I shouldn't, is the answer. Let's face it. A crapton of people think about writing. Some decent proportion of those actually talk about writing. Fewer actually attempt writing, be it fan fic, articles, endless blogging (ouch) or starting a short story or, gods forbid, a novel. <P>
Then fewer still actually FINISH the short story...and a fraction smaller still finish the novel. <P>
So what makes another writer or aspiring writer or person who thinks they know all about writing even though they never have taken the muse by the balls (well, aren't I permitted to have a male muse?!?) think they can walk up to me and insinuate that I'm wasting my time not working on something "marketable"??<P>
So that has led me to this blog entry, wherein we will examine the Top Ten Reasons Why Writing Anything You Feel Like Isn't A Waste of Your Time. <P>
10. Words on the page is words on the page. <P>
9. If you're not cat-waxing, you're making progress. <P>
8. The writer is probably the worst judge of whether what they're working on is worthwhile. <P>
7. Did you learn something from typing this? There you go. <P>
6. Even the worst piece of drivel coming out of my keyboard teaches me what NOT to do! <P>
5. I'm establishing the habit of writing something, anything, every day. <P>
4. Writing anything reduces the fear factor tied to coming to the blank page every day. Or the end of the paragraph where you're not sure what comes next. <P>
3. How are you ever going to get published anyhow unless you try things and fail or succeed? <P>
2. No matter what you are writing...you are WRITING. Do not question. Do not double-think yourself. Just DO it. And let the putting of words on the page make you happy. You are doing what you've dreamed of. Let go of the anxiety and let yourself believe that your words are worth something! <P>
And the number one reason why writing what you feel like writing, "marketable" or not, is worthwhile: <P>
1. Because George R.R. Martin told me so. So unless one of the other writers who I really admire--like maybe Neil Gaiman, Neil Stephenson, or William Gibson (and I would include Ray Bradbury and Anne McCaffrey except that, /sad, they would now have to do so from beyond the grave)--get on this blog and tell me George is full of it, I'm going to stick to that, thanks. <P>
Actually I can thank George for Numbers Eight and Seven. He and his wife Parris where nice enough to treat me to breakfast when I was traveling through Santa Fe earlier this year, and he tolerated a writing question from me--because I WAS worried. I was working on <i>East of the Sun and West of the Moon</i>, and realizing that it was actually two books. "Is this a waste of my time?" I asked him. "It's probably not salable. I'm a nobody." <P>
George told me that--though in his opinion short stories are still the way to break into the writing game--the important thing was to finish the project I was working on. No writing is wasted. You are developing your craft, seeing what works, what doesn't work. You are learning. And he told me that some of the things he wrote that he thought weren't all that or were too weird were some of the things that magazines or publishers turned out to be interested in. <P>
So there you go. And really it all comes back to something I wrote in my journal as I was just starting <i>East of the Sun :</i> DON'T JUDGE THE WORK.<P>
It isn't for you, the writer, to judge the worth of anything you're working on. It's your job to communicate, to regale the reader with the best prose you're capable of writing, to catch the passion you feel for the subject and tie that into the prose. Beyond that--don't worry about it. <P>
Just keep writing. <P>
Tomorrow: Why NaNoWriMo keeps drawing me back to it. Stay tuned!Anne F.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14442385165430082302noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825513800929037011.post-78951740136035827812012-07-23T21:44:00.003-07:002012-07-23T21:44:33.673-07:00Of Novels and Small Puppies<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Well my good friend Gwen (who was my roomie at Viable Paradise XIV) called me out recently on the fact that I haven't posted here in ages, and I PROMISED her that I would make a post today for all my faithful, probably fictional readers. That's not to insult any of you who might be non-fictional readers, it's just that I prefer to go ahead with the assumption that I am shouting words into the void. Less pressure. On occasion, yes, I do find it relaxing to imagine that I'm also just a brain in a jar. But I digress. <P>
The truth is, though I have not been blogging, I have been writing. I have been submitting short stories--very irregularly, and I hope to improve on that. But more than that, I have been raising a litter of puppies, one of whom you can see above in all her rampant adorability (which I seriously did not believe was an actual word when I typed it, but m-w.com assures me that I'm within my rights on that one). The puppies are now all going to new homes save for one, and I feel like I actually have my brain cells back enough to expound. <P>
So, yes, stories. And raising puppies. And finishing my first full-length (over 100K words) novel, actually. <P>
I'm a big fan of NaNoWriMo and nine months ago in November 2011 I decided to try a project that has been dogging my creative brain for many years now. It's a fantasy reboot of the classic Norwegian fairy tale "East o' the Sun and West o' the Moon". The story is quite classical, in fact, since part of it appears to have been inspired directly by the myth of Cupid and Psyche. So I'm re-writing it in the tradition of Robin McKinley's "Deerskin", taking the rough particulars of that tale and placing it into its own fantasy world. A lot of other fairy tales make cameos. A couple of them are not entirely Norwegian, but if they can steal Cupid and Psyche, I can steal a favorite Germanic fairy tale or two. Yes? <P>
Suffice to say that in the grand and colorful tradition of the Norwegian folk tales there are Bear Kings and troll-hags and clever foxes and cunning young women and a young man who gets in over his head. Said young man is a bit of a storyteller and so there are interwoven in the story internal stories in the tradition of <i>Watership Down</i> (one of my top five all-time favorite fantasy novels), that expand upon the mythology of the world and may enlighten the reader or hint at certain story elements.
<P>That's cool, but what's the point, you all ask? Okay, so the point is, since this IS a blog about writing and learning things, I did actually learn a lot in writing this book, both about myself and my methods of working (or not doing so...cat waxing, anyone?) and about writing a novel. I am proposing a project for myself for the next week. Every day I will sit down here at this blog and write about something I learned writing this book. <P>
Why only a week? Because in a week or so, the August session of Camp NaNoWriMo kicks off, and I will be launching myself into the second book, because I couldn't tell all of the story in just one book. So Book One is <i>East of the Sun</i>, Book Two is <i>West of the Moon</i>. There may also be a third book, cautiously entitled <i>The Bear King's Daughter</i>, which will deal with things similar and yet outside of the scope of that particular fairy tale. <P>
Now, I have friends who will lecture me that as a starting writer with no short story credits to my name, I am a fool to be writing a three-book series. I will issue my rebuttal to this tomorrow, in Day One of my Week of Write-Blogging. Stay tuned!Anne F.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14442385165430082302noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825513800929037011.post-54390806240694614842011-10-07T12:45:00.000-07:002012-07-27T20:54:18.719-07:00The Second Great Believing<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Writing a story is the First Great Believing. That crappy first draft happens with no guarantee that it will ever get published or even that anyone will like it, including the author. Nothing in the world says that the story we are using time and soul to craft will do anything for us except sit there eyeing us with vague malevolence, like the cat that never wants to jump into your lap. It's an act of faith as much as creation. We make ourselves finish it (except when we don't), and we try not to think about whether it will ever make a difference while we're working. <p>
Y'all might remember that when I started this blog I'd finished a story that got me accepted to Viable Paradise XIV. That was my First Great Believing, but of course it wasn't the end. I got a lot of good constructive criticism at VP, and that led to the first revision. Then I got some more, from my beta readers. Rinse and repeat. Then the first rejection note, making me understand a failing in my writing--here we go again. <p>
So I've revised the damn thing around five or six times and every time I go to rip another chunk of its entrails out, it's like chewing nails--which is to say, when I open the file my teeth start to ache and my mouth tastes like pointy rust. Perhaps I'm imagining it. <p>
The point of all this is that editing your story is the Second Great Believing, and for me it has been much harder. To write the story in the first place, you had to conquer earthquakes of fear, scale mountains of self-doubt and possibly even slay a dragon of disbelief or two. It felt so good to finally finish it. And then you found out there were aftershocks and tsunamis and volcanoes, and the dragon's big brother starts sending you rejection notices. And somehow, you must open that file, you must dredge up the gumption for a second (third? sixth? seventeenth?) act of faith, and you must take up your hammer and your tongs and stoke the furnace and attempt to refine this jagged blade of a story before you get too tempted to fall on it. <p>
And this is harder because instead of blissfully traipsing across the page, I am required to assess word choices, and murder entire paragraphs, and to learn new things. There were many times I made the mistake of thinking I was doing well with my writing. Then I discovered that I simply didn't know enough about my craft to see what I was doing. It's like trying to write a story with only a fifth-grade vocabulary list because you didn't know any better and then finding a copy of Roget's Thesaurus. <p>
As I go through this process of learning to be a better writer I find that I'm impatient. I shouldn't be, because I know it will take time, and stick-tuitiveness, and thought and study and practice. Becoming a really good wordsmith, like becoming a really good painter, does not happen overnight. <p>
I can feel things shifting in my head when I come to the keyboard or the storyboard. I know that I'm internalizing the process because I reach for different and better tools--dialogue instead of exposition, for example. But it's like, when you're first learning to paint, you're learning your technique. And your "eye" can develop faster than your skill. So you paint the skin and you're thrilled, and then the hair and you like that too, and then you get to the dress and you knock it out of the park--but suddenly you see that the hair is actually quite dreadful. How did THAT happen? <p>
So it's the same with writing. I think that I'm finally introducing good tension and I'm snipping away at the extra bits of prose that are just filler so my writing is leaner, and then, because I am learning so much, I take a look at my main character and OHMIGOD! There are holes. Horrible, gaping black holes with little signs posted that say "who IS your MC and why is she the best one for this story?" and "can't you think of a single word that just describes her personality and not her circumstances??" <p>
So that's where I am. I am about to muster another ounce of gumption and scrape what's left of my faith off the bottom of my shoe to push through this revision so I can send this thing out to the next market on my list. Then I can stop looking at and thinking about it for a bit. Freshen up by working on something else. <p>
At least until the dragons send me the next rejection.
<p>Cheers!
<p>
AFBAnne F.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14442385165430082302noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825513800929037011.post-62825605946058353782011-09-03T08:47:00.000-07:002011-09-03T08:49:32.644-07:00Breathing Room<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I've noticed an annoying thing about my writing in the last few weeks. I guess that how we write--especially in our rough drafts--is related to who we are, and this is sometimes more evident than we wish. I'll tell you what I'm talking about, but first we're going to talk about movie rules. <p>
We all know one of those people who have movie rules. Sometimes they're unspoken, and sometimes they're the focus of passionate arguments about what that person will NOT go to see with you. The rule may be religious (at least one person I know says they won't go to see Rated-R movies on that basis). It may be based on rabid dislike (I don't care how good <i>Inception</i> is, I can not sit in a theater staring at Leonardo di Caprio and be expected to enjoy it or to take him at all seriously. I just keep thinking about how much he looks like a human weasel.). It may be based on lack of desensitization (I didn't watch a lot of TV as a kid, and still don't, and I'm not desensitized to high levels of graphic violence, so I don't enjoy it in movies). <p>
Yes, I am one of Those People With Movie Rules. Most of the above don't even have a chance to seep into my writing. I don't have a problem with graphic violence when it's on the page, just when it's up on a 22-foot-tall sheet of vinyl in front of my face. I guess I could write Leonardo into something, but about the only way it'd fit is if I was writing a <i>Redwall</i> novel rip-off, and I love Brian Jacques' books too much for that. <p>
But the one movie rule that has proved the most insidious is this: I can't stand too much suspense. <p>
I guess that has to do with a mixture of my desensitization problem and my empathy problem. I can't watch movies where people are being humiliated or tortured; they get me honestly upset, and I don't enjoy the sensation. I guess if I found it easier to distance myself, this wouldn't be a problem. <p>
So how does it seep into my writing? I give my characters too much breathing room. <p>
This was brought up by my first reader when I handed him a new story last week, and he noted that I backed off of the rising tension right before the climax. Then I looked at my older story--the one I just got a rejection for--and I do the same damn thing! It's like characters I empathize with being put in tense situations makes me uncomfortable, so I give them a breather. Crazy talk. Who would have thought such a thing could come out, unconsciously, in my writing? <p>
And, of course, it's very harmful to any story to take a big breather unless you're building a stairway of tension--a little tension, then a short break. More tension, short break. Lots of tension, calm-before-storm. Incredible tension, climax! I wasn't doing that, though. I was interrupting the smooth rise of tension in the story just when it should have been at its most intense. To quote the awesome Blake Snyder in his fantastic script-writing book <i>Save the Cat</i>, I was breaking the tension just when "the bad guys close in". <p>
Well, the good news is that now I'm going to get a lot more conscious of this in re-writes and revisions. Maybe someone else will read this and get more conscious about rising tension in their stories. And maybe my own stories will start to drive a little more and meander a little less. <p>
At least, my beta readers sure hope so...
Anne F.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14442385165430082302noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-825513800929037011.post-36359270626873067702011-09-02T19:43:00.000-07:002011-09-02T20:03:44.949-07:00It's the Only Way to Be Sure.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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People who've read my earlier posts know that in my other life (dare I call it the "real world"), I paint miniature figures. Yes, I'm one of <i>those</i>. I also teach other people to paint them, and since I took up my writing again I've begun to notice all sorts of parallels between writing and painting. Of course, I'm not the only one to notice them--I just finished <i>The Sun, the Moon and the Stars</i> by Steven Brust, and most of that book is about writing except it's disguised as being about painting. Or maybe it's that painting is similar to writing. Or maybe that all creative vibes use the same energy. Or maybe we're just all desperate to draw parallels...but I digress. <p>
There's such a thing in painting called "over-working" your figure (or canvas). In canvas painting it's the tendency to take your fresh image and destroy it by pushing too far--not stopping when the painting is at an optimal point. It can be the same in miniature painting, people seeking a perfection that they can't achieve. But I'll also use it to describe people who paint the same figure over and over (and over!). They don't learn much because there's only so much that any given model can teach you, no matter how many different ways you paint it.
<p>
It's something I often see in beginners, because they're improving so quickly. They'll paint the body and then they'll work on the hair and they'll think "Wow! I learned something on this hair, and the body looks so messy now!" Or it'll be someone who has an image in their head of what the model should be, and they'll sit there, stubborn, and work it over and over and over. Or worse yet, they'll strip the paint off of the model and start over, or buy another copy of that one model and start over. The infamous example was a friend who, every year, brought me a different version of the same dang mermaid sculpt to critique. He'd painted them in slightly different colors, but his technique hadn't improved a bit. He was trapped in that one sculpt. I think I might have looked at him when he brought me the third one and said, "Seriously...if I see one more version of this mermaid from you, I am going to puke. Paint. Something. Else." <p>
So now...go back up and read everything I just wrote about miniature painting and substitute writing. :) <p>
When it comes down to it, we always want things to be as good as possible before we expose them to the world. But when all we do is re-work the same thing, we're trapped. So that brings me to my story. <p>
I recently got a rejection from a top magazine on a story I'd workshopped at Viable Paradise and spent countless hours on revising and re-writing and tweaking. Being me (perfectionistic little git) I immediately hyper-analyzed this rejection note. It seemed, in fact, to expose all of the dire weaknesses of the story to me (add "neurotic" to my list of sins). My first thought was "I could re-write the beginning", but it wasn't like I hadn't done that before. I was at the point where, in painting, we advise, "Step awaaaaay from the mini"--that point where we see the crazy in someone's eye and know that if we don't get them to stand up and walk away they're going to hurl the thing at someone across the table, or at the annoying kid in the game store, or run back into the casting room in search of the closest melting pot. I knew I was casting longing gazes at the gas stove for the hard copy, and wondering if "/nuke" might work on my laptop. It was, of course, that I had just stared at the damn thing too long. I couldn't tell a hole in the plot from a hole in the wall at this point. <p>
Which is when I remembered the brilliant advice. I think I read it first on Uncle Jim's thread on the Absolute Write novel board. Someone had been howling about losing their writing with their hard drive, and he replied (paraphrasing), "Re-write it from memory. You'll find it will be even better than the original." <p>
Well, I was a neurotic perfectionistic rejected writer, and I was suddenly into writing dangerously. Hell, I thought, I could completely delete and re-write the whole first section! Maybe the second section too! I know...maybe it will be a <i>completely different story</i> when I finish!! <p>
Wait...wasn't this what I told my mini-painting students too? <p>
Anyhow, the point is, at the end I realized that I was trapped. I had over-worked the heck out of that first section and I was still trying to beat it into shape, even though I could sense that it was weak and I'd never been completely happy with it. The solution was to highlight it all, hit "delete" and start absolutely fresh, writing from memory, without obligation to use any of the prior writing. And, weirdly, once I made that decision, my head filled with new ideas and great ways I could trim and re-shape the rest of the story to go with that fresh new beginning section. <p>
So what I learned this week is that Steven Brust was right, and that Uncle Jim was right, and that I should not cling to already over-worked writing just because I'd previously done everything but sacrifice a chicken over it. Sometimes you just need to nuke it from orbit. <p>
AFB<p>
(p.s. What I didn't learn this week that I was hopelessly perfectionistic and neurotic. Sorry. Knew that already.)
Anne F.http://www.blogger.com/profile/14442385165430082302noreply@blogger.com0